It’s Friday the 13th and I’m sitting in the office with my right leg up – a bag of frozen cauliflower covers my ankle from right to left. My sock is wet, toenails blue and the whole feet is numb from the cold but that’s nothing in comparison to the painful reality – my ankle is swollen.
I sprained it on my run last night.
That bloody pothole which I didn’t see! Why? Because it was covered with tons of fallen leaves. I hate them and I hate those people who didn’t clean it.
Misery, depression – the only two words that can best describe how I’m feeling right now. I want to cry.
I never cry, but I get watery eyes every time I look at my ankle.
Shit! Why me? Why now? What am I going to do? When can I run again?
The training for my big Mongolian adventure is all going to shit. I want to cry even more.
I woke up at 5am on Friday morning (time to go to gym and to yoga class) – I limb, my ankle is painful and swollen even more than last night. I go back to bed. I can’t sleep.
I know this pain, that feeling, the drill – I sprained and also broke my ankles so many times during my basketball career. It never gets easier. It’s the worst time ever – you can’t do anything. Just sit and wait until it heals. This is a total waste of time for me. I know I will fill that time with more work and reading business books but I also know that I will be very depressed. I will crave running – it’s my meditation, my Church. But, that Church is now closed. And who knows how long for.
My training was going so well – gym: 3-4 times and running: 4-5 times a week plus a yoga class on Fridays. Now I can’t do any of these. I’m playing with the idea of using my road bike and turbo trainer to compensate.
Can I do it? Isn’t this going to negatively affect the healing process?
The answer is probably yes. But I’m stubborn and I know I’ll jump on that saddle tomorrow. I can also still hit the gym and just do the core stuff. My upper body is able, so why not?
Right, the game is on!
But there is a big BUT and I know I should just rest. “Embrace the rest” as my dear friend Marina told me. And I’m going to try…but I’m still doing the core sessions.
Will also try to memorise these words of wisdom from good old Henry Ford
“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it!”
I know it’s just a sprained ankle and not the end of the World but I feel so down that I had to write about it.